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Emotional
Understanding > Aggression
Aggression
Aggression is based in anger and thus based on fear. Be that it is
rising up within you or that you are facing aggressive behaviour. There is
always an underlying reason for the fury of feelings which are arising up
within.
Dealing with someone else's
aggression
We can not help others unless they first wish to help themselves.
When we are faced with someone whom is in an aggressive mood, our
instant reaction is to mirror them and become angry and aggressive back.
It requires a great deal of self control in order to give back peace and
calm.
Circumstances would dictate whether or not the other person is going to
be in a receptive mood or not. If not; the best option is to calmly walk
away - with a small explanation, as just storming off is likely to
antagonise further. Possible explanations include informing them that you
will speak to them when they have calmed down, but that things can't be
discussed just yet. Another option is to take the discussion into a public
setting, where you will be more likely to keep voices down and to keep
yourselves calm. Such as a restaurant or bar.
It is not always viable to deal with aggression in a 'fix it' mode. The
'fix it' mode needs to come from the other person. If the aggression is
deep rooted, the other person may have just accepted it as their nature.
Their aggression is only your problem if you are facing it. It is not your
responsibility to remove their aggression.
If circumstances permit, do let them know that you do not appreciate
their aggression. But DO step back and allow them to calm down.
Dealing with our own aggression
It will pass. The burning rage and fury within us will die down.
It may not feel like it just yet; but it will. As always, we advise
that you take some time to allow yourself to feel the burning fury - in
private - and that you sit calmly using various breathing techniques to
try to calm yourself down.
Clarify why you are feeling the aggression, where it stems from. Is it
based on fear, hate, shame, worry, blame, being let down...
Understanding on what your aggression is based WILL help you to move
forwards and work towards clearing the issue at hand. Forgiveness probably
seems impossible, but it can in most cases be achieved.
Do try not to interact with other people when you are in an aggressive
mood. It isn't fair on others to feel the brunt of your aggression,
especially if they have done nothing wrong. If you feel someone has done
something wrong; aggressive behaviour isn't going to help fix the
situation. It may help you vent some anger but it won't fix the problem.
The most helpful way to vent your aggression is by writing it down,
talking it over with a friend, colleague or counsellor. Get it out, when
the aggression is out, it is not in.
Some people suggest taking up boxing or punching a pillow to get out
the aggression. This is a physical approach to getting out the aggression
- it removes the physical urge, but the emotions are still residing within
you.
Walking, and thinking whilst you walk can actually help a lot with
clearing out aggression. Especially if you can manage this to be in a
park, woods, beach or non-urban setting (as urban settings have lots going
on, people to dodge, lots of noise etc which would only add to your
'mood').
Meditation can also help with aggression, being still with your mind.
Allowing yourself time to think of nothing, to calm your mind and body.
Professional
therapies for removing aggression
When aggression is effecting your
emotional well-being, you may benefit from some form of counselling or
psychotherapy, for more information on these please click the links
below.
Relaxation therapies may help
bring you into a more peaceful state of mind. Suggested therapies
include;
For further details on the therapies
listed above, just click on them!
Here at Inner Truth we have a directory
of UK Practitioners, listed by region and category. Please use the links
below to find a practitioner near you.
Holistic methods for pacifying
aggression
Holistic Therapies that may aid in
calming or removing your aggression may include
Aromatherapy
Please do not use aromatherapy oils or scents whilst
pregnant, unless being treated by a qualified practitioner.
The following scents may assist..
- Chamomile
- Cypress
- Patchouli
- Ylang
Ylang
Spiritual methods for removing
aggression
Chakras
Depending on the source reason for the aggression,
Rebalancing of all your chakras may aid your emotional wellbeing.
The base
chakra would be the logical place to start. The base chakra covers
anger and aggression at your very core.
Crystals
The following crystals may help to assist.
- Garnet
- Obsidian
- Ruby
- Red Jasper
Other spiritual methods which may aid aggression and
your understanding of your own aggresion may include; Aura Reading,
Chakra Clearing or Clairvoyance.
Please use the links below to find UK practitioners.
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and if it feels wrong don't do it!.
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