Personal
Space
Our personal environment is shaped by our personal values
and beliefs.
Whilst, there WILL be familiar traits, your environment is
unique to you. You have to live in it, you have to feel comfortable with it.
- If you believe that everything has it's place. No doubt,
your house is immaculate and you live by your diary/filofax/personal
organiser.
- If you have low self esteem, it's likely that your home
is leaning towards the untidy side, that you never really feel comfortable
in the clothes that you wear - or tend to wear very sober colours, no
frills, more classic style clothes.
- On the flip side, flamboyant people, who dress to be
noticed, often use it to hide a lot of insecurities.
But these examples are not always true, simply because we
are a total culmination of the life we have lived and whatever you have around
you now reflects this.
However, we feel other people have expectations, so we run
around and tidy up before anyone visits (especially the parents and in-laws),
because we want to meet their standards.
We do things in a certain way, because that's what our
partner likes.
We wear certain clothes because we want to 'fit in' or 'be
noticed'.
What would happen if you wore what you wanted to wear.. What
would happen if you didn't do the clean-up dash before visitors arrived?
See, these things come down to our personal beliefs.. we
believe we have to be a certain way. we believe we have to look and act a
certain way to please other people.
How about you try being you?
Be aware of what things you do in your life to please other
people instead of yourself, and how these things differ from what you would
ideally like in your personal environment.
Environment make-over
Often we find when a long term relationship ends,
we find ourselves in a situation where we can 'truly' be ourselves. We can
wear what we want, decorate our home how we want, and do and think as we
please. However, A relationship doesn't have to end in order to give us
the room to be ourselves. It does however require a certain amount of
consideration for our partners.
Ok, so you've realised that some of the things around you
aren't truly reflective of who you are. What to do about it.
Well, first off don't trash everything and start from
scratch - not only will it dent your credit card, but you're not likely to get
it right either.
Do you feel comfortable in
your own surroundings, if not - what can you change to help express who you
are? If you are single, then you have the freedom to make these changes alone.
If you share your home or live with your partner/family then we have to be
'considerate' to the needs of others. If there is something you do not
like in communal space. Ask how others feel about it; show them what you
like.
Sometimes even something small, like an 'ornament' is a
start to allowing yourself to express yourself. A candle in the bathroom, a
plant in the kitchen or maybe you have the room available to have a 'room'
to yourself; which you can turn into your personal space.
What you wear
When we raise families, it is all too easy to wear
things which we deem comfortable or practical. We stick to plain colours,
shapeless t-shirts, jogging bottoms or jeans. We get up and put these
practical clothes on, and it doesn't help to boost who your self esteem or
self confidence.
The same applies with work; we buy work clothes,
and whilst it is important to wear a certain style at work, as we have to
adhere to our workplaces rules and regulations. It doesn't mean there are
not items out there, which reflect us which also fit in with the
regulations set out for us.
There is no reason why style - your own style -
isn't comfortable or practical. Ok, so you wouldn't wear a chiffon skirt
or a suit and tie to climb into the attic. But even so called 'practical'
clothes can reflect who we are. If you need trainers; take a good look at
all the different styles of pumps, trainers and comfy shoes which are as
practical as trainers but available in many different styles.
We have a rule here, regardless of practicality; if we don't love it, we
won't buy it. If we love it, and even if it isn't practical - we buy it!
If you always wear dark colours, go out and find something
slightly brighter, or patterned. Bring it home, don't take the tags off!! Put
it on, and view yourself. How does wearing something 'different' make you
feel? If you're not comfortable in it, then take it back. Don't give up
though, keep trying.
What you wear and how you look are very important
first impressions.
Have a look around you next time you go into town.
Look at the people in the street, at what they are wearing. Do you think,
what people wear reflects who they are?
Remember, these people you are watching; are
watching you!
So be yourself. Show the world who you are. Allow your external
environment to reflect who you are.
